pEnUnGgU pUaKa wAyAnG~

Saturday, December 31, 2011


you may say shitty things to me, condemn me on my faults but you will have no idea that i 

have been trying my very best, learning and working...then, i'll say it is you who is blind to see..i 

know who i am, and all the expectations surrounding me,  but even i believe nobody can produce


Sunday, December 25, 2011


a strong and remarkable word, should one have it, it makes you a charismatic person..
a word i wish i am able to describe myself with...
one simple stupid mistake and all the little confidence left in me is shattered to pieces....
its madness, how building confidence takes all the strength and determination a person have and its ruined in a blink of an eye...
God help me...
i know mistakes happens for a reason and i am thoroughly relieved that the mistake doesn't lead into disastrous was an excellent reminder for me so i wouldn't make real mistakes in the future...but it was painful, it makes me real scared to move on and built up again~

Thursday, November 10, 2011


here i am thinking that i am going to have another 2 months of bliss when suddenly a bombshell drop and shatters my dream to pieces..hahahhahahah..exaggerating is so like me..
but yeah, i am shocked actually that i don't even know what i am feeling right now...
the day before yesterday i bought a flight ticket back to kl for 22 nov, thinking how kind the world is to me, and then yesterday i got a text message from my mum that says i've got my induction letter for this coming 15 nov..since i have already checked in my first ticket, now i had to surrender it...such waste~and i have to spend another rm900++ for another return ticket..madness..~

now i'm thinking of the prospect of working...and i am simply terrified..
i have seen 3 of my friends working, much that they say it wasn't as bad as it seems, i am not that much convinced...
i am not trying to be excellent now, all i want is to be able to survive this 2 years of housemanship..
but i really hope that i am going to at least like going to work...
so now, i am resigning as a housewife temporarily for the next 2 years...goodbye serenity~may i find you in other ways or in another life...
oh ALLAH, i work for YOUR blessings, so i could help my parents, my siblings, my husband and building family and of course, my fellow colleague and patients...may Your mercy be mine~

Sunday, November 6, 2011

five simple rules to be happy~

another excellent story i got from facebook that i want to put up here as a reminder for me 

and people that i love if 

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the 

farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well 

needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and 

began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and 

cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at

 what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something 

amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it 

off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over

 the edge of the well and happily trotted off!


Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to 

shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of 

the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happens.

3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less from people but more from God

raya haji 2011

hujan lebat gile macam ade banjir turun dari langit dari malam tadi sampaila skrg neh...
so, pagi raya adelah pagi yang sgt kelabu~wuuu...mungkin die dah cerah tadi tapi aku tak perasan, kan? yerla aku bangun kul 11am kot..hahahahahaha...
bangun pon sbb kebuluran dah yg aku tahankan sejak semalam...hahahaha...
so bangun tengahari, mandi-mandi, bukak peti ais pikir nak makan ape..
lalu konklusinye ialah: nasik putih semalam yang dihangatkan sekali dengan ayam goreng spicy sejak dari zaman bile aku pon tak tahu, dicampur dengan kicap manis habhal yg lazat berkrim dan sos cili kimball terbaik dari ladang dihidangkan bersama segelas air milo panas, menjadikan anda sihat dan kuat!
makan sambil layan adnan sempit kat tv...
sorang-sorang kat rumah neh sebab housemate lain sume kerja sampai ke malam...hukkk

sehingge post ini ditulis, itu jelah aktiviti hari raya aku...

Friday, November 4, 2011

3 Soalan 1 Penampar...

Jawapan dengan Tamparan...

Pemuda : Anda siapa Dan apakah bisa menjawab pertanyaan-pertanyaan saya?

Imam : Saya hamba Allah dan dengan izin-Nya saya akan menjawab pertanyaan anda
Pemuda : Anda yakin? Sedangkan Profesor dan ramai orang yang pintar tidak mampu

 menjawab pertanyaan saya.

Imam : Saya akan mencuba sejauh kemampuan saya.

Pemuda : Saya ada 3 pertanyaan:-

1.Kalau memang Tuhan itu ada,tunjukan wujud tuhan kepada saya

2.Apakah yang dinamakan takdir

3.Kalau syaitan diciptakan dari api kenapa dimasukan ke neraka yang dibuat dari api,

tentu tidak menyakitkan buat syaitan. Sebab mereka memiliki unsur yang sama
Apakah Tuhan tidak pernah berfikir sejauhitu?

Tiba-tiba Imam tersebut menampar pipi pemuda tadi dengan keras.

Pemuda : Kenapa anda marah kepada saya? (sambil menahan sakit)

Imam : Saya tidak marah. Tamparan itu adalah jawaban saya atas 3 pertanyaan yang anda 

ajukan kepada saya.

Pemuda : Saya sungguh-sungguh tidak mengerti.

Imam : Bagaimana rasanya tamparan saya?

Pemuda : Tentu saja saya merasakan sakit.

Imam : Jadi anda percaya bahawa sakit itu ada?

Pemuda : Ya!

Imam : Tunjukan pada saya wujud sakit itu!

: Saya tidak boleh.

Imam : Itulah jawaban pertanyaan pertama. Kita semua merasakan kewujudan Tuhan tanpa

 mampu melihat wujudnya
Imam : Apakah tadi malam anda bermimpi akan ditampar oleh saya?

Pemuda : Tidak.

Imam : Apakah pernah terfikir oleh anda akan menerima tamparan dari saya hari ini?

Pemuda : Tidak
Imam : Itulah yang dinamakan takdir
Imam : Terbuat dari apa tangan yang saya gunakan untuk menampar anda?

Pemuda : Kulit.

: Terbuat dari apa pipi anda?

Pemuda : Kulit.

Imam : Bagaimana rasanya tamparan saya

Pemuda : Sakit.

Imam : Walaupun syaitan dijadikan dari api dan neraka juga terbuat dari api, jika

Tuhan menghendaki maka neraka akan menjadi tempat yang menyakitkan untuk

p/s: got this from facebook..i like this story~some things does not need too much 

bombastic  explanation..a simple one will simply do...especially for those who is 

narrow minded enough to have to ask the question at the first place

Thursday, November 3, 2011


  1. blackberry atau seumpama dengannye...huhu
  2. gelang tangan yang cantik gile (takyah emas pon tape)
  3. baju kurung
  4. handbeg (meskipon aku tak reti nak gune bendealah neh)
  5. kasut clark (mati ko!! baek kumpul duet skrg...hahahahaha)
  6. telekung
  7. kek secret recipe ntk kiah
  8. stetescope baru or otoscope (mantap ini)
  9. baju dan alatan baby...heeee comelnye hantaran ini!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  10. coklat2 yang best~
  11. buah2an (standard ah tuh)

list di atas adelah bende-bende yang aku nak sangat masuk dalam hantaran aku...tgk, 11 je aku taruk..baikkan aku? hahahahahahahaha...

tapi aku dapat 21 hantaran doi...melangut aku nak reply semula~siryes, aku tak tipu...sile jangan mintak hantaran byk-byk beb..dahla membeli bende nak masuk dalam hantaran tuh da byk duit kuar, nak menghiasnye lagi satu hal..bukan murah satu hiasan ntk satu hantaran

so, number 1 and 2 aku tak dapat...number 5 ganti ngan kasut scholl...number 7, 8, 9 tak dapat cemane die boleh jadik 21, haaa....tak payah laa tanye~pening aku nak list satu-satu...huhu..

senanye bende neh aku pos semule sebagai ingatan ntk aku...

banyak bende yang aku nak tp tak dapat...but in the end, aku dapat sesuatu yang aku perlu, yang berjutaan manusia sanggup mati ntk dapat jugak~guess?

Monday, October 24, 2011

morning sunshine

got up at 5.30 am, preparing his breakfast...

remembered reading facebook status these days, of friends complaining about not getting to see the sunshine due to work...

then, i looked out the window and saw the beautiful morning ray of sunshine at 6.00am here in tawau..

well, i guess i am never going to miss the sunshine then!

but the thing is, i still can't get use to this despite being here for almost a month already...when i was little, i when to school at 7.00am, and the sunshine is barely there...but the students her  went to school at 7.00am, yet the morning is almost like a semenanjung's afternoon...ahaks

Saturday, October 22, 2011

a life plan

i'm watching people near me~left and right, front and back calculating on their life plans..
trying to carry out their lives based on a plan that they have outlined before by themselves or by some other people, parents or spouses perhaps..
somehow i couldn't grasp the idea of a planned life, so detailed its making me lose my nerves..
all i wanted to do is enjoy everyday of my life (in a good way) and trying to make the best out of it everyday without having to worry about yesterday or tomorrow...
sure, i have to have a vision of what i am going to be 10 years from now and work for it..i do have it~
but what i couldn't understand is how do you make the vision so detailed when you couldn't even know what's going to happen tomorrow? or maybe, the next hour of your life...or maybe, the next second...

my plan in 10 years is become an excellent mother like what i have as a child.. and even better, a mother who will be able to provide material and emotional fulfillment to my family, and most importantly to my that is going to happen really depends on how i carry out my life today and tomorrow..
so i picture myself as someone who is a mostly-home-based full-time mother and part-time doctor..being a mother is i suppose a natural instinct in all women, so the only thing i have to work on now is to make myself a part-time doctor~which isn't actually an ambitious plan of all, though i am sure isn't going to be easy as well, but i believe, it'll give more satisfaction to me...because then, i will have more time to explore the world with my worldly possession aka my family...
anyway, who am i working hard for if not for my own family and ultimately for His blessings?
and apart from that, become an investor with my husband so that my children have a good future...(this is a very cliche statement)

the details of it will be outlined as my life goes on, at how every decisions in every aspect of life are made by us,   at how we carry out ourselves as a civilized human being...and that's what i am trying very hard to do now because it involves my deeply in-grained personality as well as emotional and intelligent quotient..

Friday, October 14, 2011

i want


delicious cakes
ice cream


story books

new movies
new dress/blouse
new bag



Sunday, October 9, 2011

new life

currently in tawau, with my husband who has already started work as a house officer in tawau general hospital..
my first impression of tawau: empty..hahahahahaha
but its the life that i have always imagined..quiet, peaceful and village-like..
so i can't complain a lot
i am homesicked..i miss my mum most and cried every night..its been a long time since i have separated from her, and yet never this far...somehow it makes me wonder, how other people manage to live in the overseas, a million miles away from their family..they must be very brave and steel-hearted...i must be like them!! i guess being jobless (at my own choice) makes me have too much time to let my emotion wander..

thank goodness i am here for work, because then i will be able to earn money and get my mum here..if i am here to study, i can't imagine how badly homesick i will be..huhu

anyways, i am truly looking forward to explore yet another new place i have never been to~
hopefully, its worth all the pain...

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

song of the night: skyscraper

skyscraper: demi lovato

Skies are crying,
I am watching,
Catching teardrops in my hands.
Only silence, as it's ending,
Like we never had a chance.
Do you have to make me feel
Like there's nothing left of me?

You can take everything I have,
You can break everything I am,
Like I'm made of glass,
Like I'm made of paper.
Go on and try to tear me down.
I will be rising from the ground,
Like a skyscraper,
Like a skyscraper.

As the smoke clears,
I awaken,
And untangle you from me.
Would it make you feel better
To watch me, while I bleed?
All my windows still are broken,
But I'm standing on my feet.
You can take everything I have,
You can break everything I am,
( From: )
Like I'm made of glass,
Like I'm made of paper.
Go on and try to tear me down.
I will be rising from the ground,
Like a skyscraper,
Like a skyscraper.

Go run, run, run.
I'm gonna stay right here,
Watch you disappear.
Yeah, ohh.
Go run, run, run.
Yeah, it's a long way down,
But I am closer to the clouds,
Up here.

You can take everything I have,
You can break everything I am,
Like I'm made of glass,
Like I'm made of paper.


Go on and try to tear me down.
I will be rising from the ground,
Like a skyscraper

ditujukan khas to him who hates me even if he only pretends to..

Monday, September 26, 2011


sent my husband off to tawau, for his 2 years housemanship posting..i will be following him soon but waiting for my time to finally come is agonizing...
i miss him so much, i feel like i am gonna die~
i hate being desperate for money...
what am i gonna do???

Friday, September 23, 2011

new baby

bought a new baby: a Nikon D3000...
i am soo in love with my new camera, but i have a lot to learn at how to use it properly and maximizing its potential..
it sure does cost me my whole savings and lots of emotional fights, but when i got the deal, i just knew i have to have it, which is why i allowed my bank account to be emptied and i make a loan with my husband..hehehehe..for all its worth, i am very happy~
if you are interested to have a look just click here

Thursday, September 8, 2011

wedding preparation 2...

i am knackered!!!
but satisfied
and absolutely nervous....takut..takut..takut..
and i really, really need a good break after this before i start working...
will someone please sponsor my honeymoon??

hantaran almost ready

room decoration done! just need to find some fresh flowers for my vase

close up view of my hand-made floral carpet..hehe

i just love this thing!

hand-made backdrop done~do excuse the untidy bed..huhu
close up!

menu of the day:

1.       Main menu:
a.       Nasi minyak dan nasi putih
b.      Daging masak hitam: imported from kampung! home made!!!
c.       Ayam masak merah
d.      Gulai kawan daging
e.      Ayam kuzi: home-made by my mama!! one of the reasons of my 2 sleepless nights
f.        Ikan masin
g.       Acar buah
h.      Ulaman dan sambal belacan

2.       Side dish
a.       Laksa
b.      Lemang
c.       Serunding
d.      Nasi impit dan kuah kacang: home made also by my mama!!-also one of the reason of my 
sleepless night... 
3.       Dessert:
a.       Bubur kacang
b.      Tapai: all the way from my other kampung in Tampin!
c.       Buah-buahan
d.      Donat
e.      Karipap

4.       Minuman:
a.       Teh tarik
b.    Sirap selasih

last but not least, my prayers that everything will go smoothly...without any casualties...huhu

Thursday, September 1, 2011

tak suka

tak suka bile org cakap 2 perkataan ni:

1. beranak pinak: ayatnye," nanti ko dah beranak pinak, ko taulaa susah ke senang ke bla..bla..bla." nyampah ok..bunyik die macamlaaa org tuh da tukar jadik haiwan...hahaha..siryes perkataan tu buat aku rase geli sebab die mengingatkan aku kat kucing yang beranak pinak tak kire ngan sesape pon~hoh..pastu plak dia buat perkataan tu macam tak seronok langsung...

2. perut meletup: seorang budak lelaki jmpe kawan die yang pempuan yang pregnant lalu die bertanye," ehh, bile perot ko nak meletop eh?" hee biadab and sangat tak sensitif ok bunyik nye..pastu tak menarik langsung..dahla pempuan tu penat mengandungkan budak, pastu sesuke nak soh perut die meletup..kalao gune ayat baik sikit tak boleh ke???

Thursday, August 25, 2011

my wedding preparation..

i'm loving it but its taking away all the energy i have, it makes me wonder how people actually go into war during fasting period..huhu..
mostly the item we use for the dowry and bridal room are handmade so as to save the basically it involves making flowers out of fabrics, stitching stuff, gluing things, scrutinizing and getting frustrated at random objects, ironing a 10 feet curtain, getting backache, sleepless nights and headaches..all in the name of cutting the budget..hehe
should my child wants to get married in a low cost situation, i would strongly advice them to stay away from having the reception during raya...huhu

the 10 feet curtain..dunno why the picture is so ugly like this..bought the purple curtain with my own money..rm2 per meter but the cream one i borrowed from my grandmother...
side rack instead of side table..spent rm20 for this rack~there will a bowl filled with purple pot pourri but will be added later because i can't stand the perfume...hahaha
handmade dowry tray...hehehehe pillows more like..spent rm25 for all of these
handmade flowers for the bridal room expenditure for this flowers and the purple curtain not yet confirmed..
side table...i had to spend about rm25 for this table...but i will be needing some fresh flowers for the vase later...

Saturday, August 20, 2011

kiah the legend

lawak satu

Qiah: abg oman, buangkn plastic roti krim ni..
Me: qiah buang la sndiri
Qiah: tgn qiah ada 2 je.. sebelah pgang roti, sebelah lg pon pgang roti..
Me: ok la.. bak plastik tu nk buang
Qiah: nah!
Me: ha tu bole pgang.. pegy buang sndiri..
Qiah: alaaaaaa..hmm

lawak dua

Me: qiah, sayang abg oman x??
Qiah: sayang la..
Me: qiah rindu abg oman x??
Qiah: rindu laaa..
Me: qiah, rindu tu ape?
Qiah: urmmm.. ntah? qiah x tawu..

Friday, August 19, 2011

lawak cik kiah part 1


  1. kiah: my youngest sister
  2. oman: my 2nd brother
  3. yong: me!
lawak 1:

Qiah: ini permainan, sape2 yg lain pegang bola, dy kalah..
Abg oman: abes kalaw qiah yg pegang bola??
Qiah: qiah xpe.. ni bola qiah..

lawak 2:

Qiah: abg oman, ni apa?
Abg oman: apa tu?
Qiah: ni lutut tangan kan??
Abg oman: hahaha tu siku la ngek..

lawak 3:

kiah yg tgh makan burger..
kiah: yong, makan timun ni..kiah tanak timun ni.... (sambil hulur timun yang pastuh tetibe die sumbat semula dalam mulut dia n jilat2 timun tuh)
me: eh, kate nak bg yong, yg pegi jilat2 masuk mulut semula timun tu apesal??
kiah: iyelaa, kat timun tu ade mayonis, kiah nak mayonis die...
me: hampeh~

lawak 4:

kiah: yong jangan laa naik dlu
me: naik mane?
kiah: naik atas laa..
me: atas mane?
kiah: atas kipas.....
me: eh?

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

jar of hearts..

this song has got meanings for me..
you can define love in many ways in your life, right?
it doesn't have to stop at your partner only...or maybe, ex-partners~
which is why this lyric is a reminder of how words can tear you apart and leave scars to be remembered all your could have been easier if i am still a child, cez its easier to forget all the pain..but not now when i have all the emotions, dignity and what is left of my well as an already shattered relationship..
i am learning to forgive you for all your terrible weaknesses that has caused pain in my life..but it doesn't mean i will ever forget it..
i am learning to be happy despite all the scars you've created, but it doesn't mean i will ever forget it...
i am learning to re-script my life, my habits, my principals from all the conditioning you've put me through all those years, so i will never ever become someone like you..but it doesn't mean i will ever forget it...
i am trying not to blame you for the person i am becoming now..for all the temper, the coldness you have passed on to me, i will take resposibility for that and i will definitely re-make my personality so that i won't remind myself and everyone around me of you, so i could live in peace without you haunting my life ever again, so you can never be the center of my existence anymore...but it doesn't mean i will ever forget it..
theres just one thing i have always wondered all my life though, possibly the only thing i am amazed about you, that is how one person can create such disaster in so many lives

No, I can't take one more step towards you
‘Cause all that's waiting is regret
Don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore
You lost the love I loved the most

I learned to live, half alive
And now you want me one more time

Who do you think you are?
Runnin' 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are?

I hear you're asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

I've learned to live, half alive
And now you want me one more time


It took so long just to feel alright
Remember how you put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
‘Cause you broke all your promises
And now you're back
You don't get to get me back

Saturday, August 13, 2011

wanita vs lelaki disisi Islam...

Kaum feminin cakap “susah jadi wanita”, mereka telah digoda dan diperdaya oleh syaitan dan hawa nafsunya sendiri, seperti yang kita lihat dialog dibawah, bagaikan mempersoalkan ketentuan Allah terhadap mereka. Dengan kata lain yang agak kasar, Allah berat ...sebelah pada kaum wanita. remaja perempuan A:

“Aduh, situ tutup, sini tutup. Susah la gini. Apasal laki-laki mudah saja. Tak pakai baju pun takpe. Perempuan auratnya lagi banyak.”

Keluhan isteri A:

“Kenapa la kita para isteri ni nak keluar kena minta izin dari suami kita, padahal suami kita nak keluar kemana-mana pun tak bagitau kita takpe pulak.”

Keluhan remaja perempuan B:

“Jika kita ikut faraid dalam hal pusaka, rugilah kita. Sebab bahagian harta pusaka perempuan lagi sedikit berbanding harta yang anak lelaki dapat. Kami mahu keadilan!”

Keluhan isteri B:

“Kenapa Allah jadikan wanita mengandung dan rasa sakitnya nak melahirkan anak. Suami kita rileks saja? Masa buat anak carilah kita, masa nak beranak kita tanggung sendiri!”

Keluhan isteri C:

“Islam kata kita perempuan wajib taat pada suami, tapi ada Islam cakap suami perlu taat pada isterinya? Mana keadilan pada kaum hawa?”

Keluhan isteri D:

“Bila nak cerai je, suami yang boleh jatuhkan talak. Kenapa isteri tak bolek ceraikan suaminya? Kenapa?”

Keluhan remaja perempuan C:

“Wanita takleh nak beribadat macam lelaki, sebab bila kita ada haid dan nifas, takleh nak solat dan puasa. Ingat perempuan ni suka ke tak solat dan puasa?”.

Dan kemudian datanglah pertubuhan dan organisasi yang membela kaum wanita, dan menuntut hak samarata antara gender, mengekploitasi fahaman wanita yang terjejas akidahnya dek kerana disogok pertanyaan. Kaum lelaki pula cakap, “Ah, mujur aku ni lelaki!”

Tunggu..! Istigfarlah pada wanita yang ada perasaan seperti di atas. Mujur ada seorang lelaki yang bukanlah seorang ustaz namun amat yakin bahawa Allah itu Maha Adil. Dia tidak mampu menuturkan sabda Rasulullah s.a.w dan petikan dari ayat Al-Quran, namun dengan keimanan dan ilmu sedikit yang dia ada ,diolah sebaiknya untuk menjawab soalan-soalan melampau itu.

Lelaki beriman menjawab keluhan remaja perempuan A:

“Cik adik, Islam lah yang mengangkat aurat wanita. Benda yang mahal harganya akan dijaga dan dibelai serta disimpan ditempat yang teraman dan terbaik. Awak ada emas dan permata, adakah awak nak letak terdedah ditepi laluan lalu lalang atau disimpan dirumah agar tiada siapa melihat perhiasan itu? Ok, jika awak letakkan perhiasan tadi dikalangan orang, agaknya apa akan jadi dengan barang perhiasan tadi? Lelaki, yang utama hanyalah bawah pusat ke lutut tapi awak? Saya tidak dapat melihat kulit anda pun kecuali muka dan tangan! Awak tak mungkin akan terangsang nafsu tengok saya hanya berseluar pendek ke lutut kan? Tapi kalau sebaliknya, jangankan saya, tapi tok imam pun akan tercabut serbannya jika tengok awak pakai hanya seluar pendek!”

Lelaki beriman menjawab keluhan isteri A:

“Ok, isteri perlu taat pada suami. Jadi, lelaki apa? Suami perlu wajib taat juga kepada ibunya tiga kali lebih utama dari ayahnya, walaupun dia sudah berkeluarga. Isteri tidak perlu lagi, taatnya hanya pada suami. Kenapa awak perlu taat pada suami? Kerana suami kalian lah yang menanggung dosa yang kalian lakukan!”

Lelaki beriman menjawab keluhan remaja perempuan B:

“Betul ke wanita menerima warisan pusaka lagi sedikit daripada lelaki? Tapi kan, harta itu memang hak untuk wanita itu dan dia berhak lakukan apa saja yang dia mahu. Shh.. jangan kongsi dengan sape-sape walaupun suami. Tak kesian pada lelaki ke, dia perlu membahagikan harta pusaka itu kepada isteri dan anak-anaknya. Kalau isteri dia ramai, anak dia ramai, harta pulak secebis, tak merasa lah jawabnya!”

Lelaki beriman menjawab Keluhan isteri B:

“Tahniah la sebab awak dapat mengandung dan melahirkan. Setiap kali awak begitu, wanita itu didoakan oleh sekalian makhluk dan malaikat! Beruntungnya awak! Andaikan awak meninggal pula masa beranak tu, percayalah… itu mati syahid dan ganjarannya syurga. Ya, syurga menanti awak malah beranak 15 kali pun sihat sampai ke tua! Sebab tu tak ramai orang wanita meninggal masa melahirkan !”

Lelaki beriman menjawab Keluhan isteri C:

“Akhirat nanti, saya dan lelaki lain didunia ini akan diminta bertanggungjawab keatas empat jenis wanita. Siapa? Mereka ialah isteri saya, ibu saya, anak perempuan saya dan adik perempuan saya. Tahu maksudnya? Awak nanti di akhirat, awak akan dibantu oleh empat lelaki! Siapa mereka? Mereka ialah suami, ayah, adik atau abang malah anak lelaki awak!”

Lelaki beriman menjawab Keluhan remaja perempuan C:

“Nak beribadat macam lelaki? Ingat mudah ke nak dapat syurga? Sedarlah, awak sebagai wanita boleh masuk sebarang pintu syurga yang awak sukai. Ya, dah la syurga, ada pilihan pula hanya dengan empat cara. Apa itu? Solat lima waktu, berpuasa bulan Ramadhan, menjaga kehormatan dan tahu apa satu lagi? Taat pada suami awak. Itu saja asasnya!”

Lelaki beriman menjawab Keluhan isteri D:

“Saya, seorang lelaki wajib berjihad fisabilillah. Awak, seorang wanita jika taat akan suaminya,dan menunaikan tanggungjawabnya kepada Allah, maka awak akan turut menerima pahala setara seperti pahala orang pergi berjihad fisabilillah tanpa perlu mengangkat senjata!”

Lelaki beriman bertanya:

“Sebenarnya, apa lagi yang awak mahu, wahai kaum hawa?”

Namun, wanita-wanita tadi menangis dan salah seorangnya berkata;

“MasyaAllah, sayangnya Allah pada wanita, namun kami sendiri yang mengheret diri ke neraka yang mana ramainya kaum kami berbanding kaum lelaki!”

Demikianlah dialog wanita-wanita yang curiga itu dengan seorang lelaki biasa namun beriman.

Musuh Islam tidak akan berhenti melakukan segala upaya, sampai kita ikut dan tunduk kepada cara-cara dan peraturan yang dipromosikan dan diperjuangkan mereka.

Allah, yang menciptakan kita, maka sudah pasti Dia yang Maha Tahu pada manusia, sehingga segala hukumNya malah peraturanNya, tentulah yang terbaik bagi manusia dibandingkan dengan segala peraturan yang dicipta manusia.

Wahai lelaki, jagalah isterimu kerana dia perhiasan, pakaian dan ladangmu, sebagaimana Rasulullah s.a.w pernah mengajarkan agar kaum lelaki berbuat baik selalu (lembut) terhadap isteri anda sekalian.

Berbahagialah wahai para muslimah. Tunaikan dan menegakkan agamamu, nescaya syurga menanti...

Friday, August 12, 2011

money that kills..

sekarang isu orang muslim yang kene tangkap dalam gereja tuh nga hangat~
aku bukan orang yang arif dengan bende-bende keagamaan ni, tapi sebagai seorang ahli masyarakat, sedikit sebanyak aku faham ape yang berlaku dalam masyarakat neh..
aku hidup dikeliling manusia yang susah dan yang senang..dari zaman aku belajar, sampailah tak lame lagi aku nak kerja, orang-orang ni lah yang ajar aku bende-bende yang tersirat dalam buku-buku teks aku...
satu bende yang aku terkesan ni mase aku belajar psikiatri kat HKL dlu lebih kurang setahun dlu...ade seorang pesakit ni kene admit sebab ape entahla aku tak ingat..tapi yang menariknye adelah hidup die..die ni orang india yg tade kerja initially,  tapi dibantu oleh orang kristian dari gereja-gereja..mubaligh kristian ni sume bantu dia dari segi kewangan, tempat tinggal and sampailaa carik kerja..mase die cerita tentang kehidupan die tu, make timbullah sorang doc ni cerita yang sebenarnye banyak pergerakan-pergerakan keagamaan yang  mcm ni yang berdakwah dengan cara membantu orang-orang yg tak berkemampuan ni...

bende ni buat aku berfikir, macam mana pergerakan-pergerakan ni boleh ada duit untuk bantu orang-orang lain dalam skala yang banyak secara konsisten bile sebuah negara yang ade lebih 20 juta rakyat yang kene bayar cukai tak boleh nak bantu sebanyak tuh?
mana pergi duit-duit zakat dan orang2 Islam sendirik sampaikan saudara Islam yg lain sanggup ambil duit org bukan Islam hanya untuk membolehkan dia makan hari ni dan tidur beratap?

orang akan marah mereka-mereka yang amek duit orang bukan Islam ni dengan alasan menggadaikan agama sendirik demi wang...tapi cube korang letak diri korang dalam kasut dorang..kalo korang tade kerja, tade duit, ade plak anak 2 3 orang yang kebuluran menangis-nangis mintak makan, rumah pon merempat ntah kat memane, kalo dapat duduk bawah jambatan pun dah kire bagus..pergi mintak bantuan JKM tapi kene tolak bulat-bulat, kalo dapat pon seciput je (kite sume tau, dengan ekonomi sekarang, kalo dapat rm500 pon belum tentu ckup untuk 2 minggu), mintak duit zakat pon ikot nasib badan dapat ke tak, last2 mintak sedekah tepi jalan, pastuh tetibe ade orang datang and offer utk bagi tempat tinggal dan makanan yang elok ntk diri sendiri dan anak-anak, cemana?

kite bukan di posisi yang betul untuk meng-judge orang-orang ini...aku percaya, mereka ni sangat-sangat terdesak sehingge sanggup bertindak mcm ni...di posisi kite, ape yang kite boleh buat ialah mencari jalan supaya saudara seIslam tak perlu jadi begini untuk meneruskan hidup....kite sepatutnye malu yang amat sangat sebab membiarkan saudara-saudara kite teraniaya mcm ni..kalau ditanye diakhirat nanti, ape nak jawab?

you can only say money is not everything when you have a lot of it~

Lack of money is the root of all evil.
George Bernard Shaw

Saturday, August 6, 2011

self induce sleep deprivation~

such a nice be able to sleep and wake at own's leisure without having to worry about anything at all.. i have waited for a very long time for this moments to come, to be able to sit and think about what i have done in life, to do things i have never been able to do before this, to be able to rethink the plans of my future life without rushing, being able to sit in the comforts of my siblings and mother whole-heartedly and just being able to rest is such a bliss... i am truely enjoying it though i really wish my husband is near me...

soon, i'll be back in action and i'll have to leave this pattern of life again..but i promise that my efforts after this is going to get me back into this time, this pleasure, this serenity~later, if not earlier, so that i can finally serve and nurture those who really needs me~my family~

p/s: if not because of that one person, i might not feel like leaving home at all..

Friday, August 5, 2011


susah nak accept, someone yang sepatutnya protect kite from all sorts of pain, emotionally and physically, is the one who actually breaks you to pieces from the moment you start to breathe the air of the world....someone who actually yell and curse those who tries to hurt my feelings are the same person who yells and curse at me for the smallest, impossible reasons to be cursed upon...such hypocrisy, its absolutely disgusting

all this years, you may break me into nothingness, but you have already done that long before...i just couldn't care anymore... i may be a part of you, but unfortunately, you are the one who wrench me apart from you..


you can't be my protector..tapi,
cukuplah ALLAH sebagai pelindungku...

p/s: to my husband..thank you for trying to be supportive and understanding of me and my labile emotion~

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

from acheh with love

 to acheh from 15/7/11 to 18/7/11...
such an amazing experience for i get to go to a beautiful place with lots of beautiful people...

this is my first trip out of malaysia...i made my passport just because of this visit and this is my first ever passport..
i am gonna outline some of my experience here

day 1:
  1. arrived at bandar udara internasional iskandar muda at about 12 pm (1 pm malaysian time), we were collected by our amazing host, pak rafar and his friends..
  2. our first stop was dayah daruzzahidin where we will be spending our nights and doing our community project there..
  3. next was warkop (warung kopi) solong at ulee kareng. this is the most famous coffee shop here at banda acheh and true to its title, they serve the most bitter yet excellent i learnt that food are served at your table without you asking for it, you don't have to eat it, but once you touch it you have to pay~so be careful...but the foods were simply delicious
  4. next was sightseeing around banda acheh..we went to the massive grave where they bury about 20 000 bodies of tsunami victim in one grave, located next to the leftover of meuraxa hospital in ulee lheue just next to the sea..then to masjid baiturrahim which was also hit by tsunami but amazingly did not suffer too much of damage like the other buildings around it. being sited just next to the sea, it is totally amazing..then we visited the ulee lhueu sea where we had satay padang, baked corn (soo nice!) and jasmine tea drink..hehe
  5. pray at masjid raya baiturrahman. this mosque was 'saved' by piles of rubbishes that was carried by the tsunami wave. the piles of rubbishes forms some sort of a wall that prevents the strong current from tearing down the mosque. it was told that even the carpets inside the mosque was dry when the water was as high as the minarets..amazing..
  6. dinner at a restaurant. we ate rice with ayam penyet, fried fish, sayur kangkung and udang tepung..also had alpuket (blended avocado with chocolate) and es teler (i am not sure what this is but i think its a mixture of coconut drink with coconut milk and jackfruit and other agar-agar)
  7. then is getting ready for our community project next day!
2. at dayah daruzzahidin...first drink from acheh..

your parking man...have to pay him so he'll guide us where to park our car..

massive grave entrance
at massive grave

meuraxa hospital, ulee lheue

massive grave

RSU: rumah sakit umum aka hospital

masjid baiturrahim, ulee lheue
pantai ulee lheue

masjid raya baiturrahman

ayam penyet pak ulis


es teler
day 2:
  1. community project at dayah daruzzahidin..we did sunathon and medical check up..this is the first time i wrote a referral letter for a patient..i am hoping beyond everything that i am doing justice to the patients despite my lack of confidence, skills, knowledge and know, being a fresh graduate..huk
  2. lunch at wisata (pantai/sea) pasir putih...true to its name, not only the sand is white but the water is as blue as it can be and soo clear you can even count the pebbles and rocks and all the sea things in the water...beautiful place i feel like not going away..the only terrifying thing was we were attacked by a couple of goats which in the end, one of our friend has to sacrifice her rice and chicken to the goats...
  3. went to pak rafar's bookshop where we met lots of fascinating books..unfortunately, i didn't have the hearts to buy it because i simply can't read indonesian language...they induce headaches~
  4. dinner at pak rafar's house...his house were extremely beautiful! and we had nice ikan bakar and the thing that i can't forget about this dinner is the drink...too bad i didn't take its picture..hmm
  5. back to dayah!
dayah daruzzahidin

writing a referral letter
pantai pasir putih

day 3:
  1. went to 2 hospitals: rumah sakit iskandar muda and rumah sakit bulan sabit merah..both have its own memories for pak ikram (our lecturer) which was why we had to go there...hehe
  2. went to acheh tsunami museum.. the building was extravagant, i thought its just too much but then i was told that it was build in such a way that it is strong enough to face the next earthquake and tsunami should it happen again. it is also built as shelter and educational centre...fascinating...
  3. visited the site where a 70 tonne ship was left, carried away about 8km from the sea. it was left there because moving it back to the sea is too costly. so there it becomes a monument of tsunami
  4. visited lampuuk mosque and prayed there. this is another amazing mosque. it is located 400 m from the sea where the tsunami wave started and it is the only building that stays strong in that lampuuk was told that there was a very old chief who takes care of the mosque. he was a stroke patient, unable to move freely already. during the tsunami, he did not attempt to runaway as he was unable to do so, so he left his fate to the hands of God..and amazingly, he and the mosque was saved and he only died 2 years after the tsunami...hmm
  5. went to pantai lampuuk for lunch. this is another amazing sea because this is the first  time i ever saw such big waves crashing about..well, its big enough to drown me but not enough to play water ski...hehehe..i so love watching the waves, its just so captivating. i burnt my face here...huk~
  6. shopping at banda acheh...bought a new maxi dress, a handbag and faiz got his new shirt there..nice!
  7. dinner at pak rafar's.. we also had alpuket there...and we slept at his house for the night~

replica of masjid lampisang at lampuuk in tsunami museum...see how it stands strong when everything around it is already in rubbles
a replica in tsunami museum showing the situation when tsunami arrives
the 7tonne ship that was carried away 8km from the sea...

ship is closed for visits at prayer hour

on the roof of masjid lampisang, lampuuk...its so strong it can even stand my weight..hehe

at lampuuk beach...awesome scenery, awesome waves!

day 4:
leaving on a jetplane....sigh~
  1. saying goodbye to our temporary roomates at dayah motivations to students there thought actually they are the ones who motivates me..
  2. saying goodbye to pak rafar and his family...
  3. one day i'll be back to acheh again!
  4. with pak rafar. our wonderful host
    with my dormmate in acheh
with an achehian avocado in my new dress..hehehehe
funny book...kentut=fart~imagine someone spending his life writing a book about the power of farting..ahaks..

there are many more pics but i guess this is about now...there are like 500 pics so its impossible to be sharing everything anyways..hehehe
til then!

HIT2 me...